Some of you faithful readers may remember my nasty experience with the Crest Pro-Health Night mouthwash. It burned the bejezus out of my tongue! This in spite of the “no burn” non-alcohol formula. I mean it literally chemical burned my tongue to death. All of the little papillae really were being melted right off. So much so that my tongue was actually bleeding! Just from using Crest Pro-Health mouthwash a couple of times. I had to discontinue use. Obviously. It was bad. Very very bad.
Well, it having been a long time, and I, looking for a new toothpaste to try, decided I’d give Crest and their “Pro-Health” line another try.
I know, stupid me, right? My wife even told me so. She asked me if I was crazy when I picked it up at the store. But surely it would be better. This, after all, was gum-protection toothpaste. Surely the Crest Pro-Health Clinical Gum Protection Toothpaste would be gentle and protective of my mouth’s soft tissues like my gums and tongue and cheeks, right? I mean that is the point of it after all, right? So surely this time would be different and this Crest Pro-Health dental product would be safe for me to use. Right?
It’s been three days now. I gave it an honest chance. But once again, I’ve been burned. Literally. Chemical burned!
You see all that white stuff on my finger there? No, that’s not snot, but it is gross! That’s what used to be my cheeks. Thanks to Crest Pro-Health Clinical Gum Protection Toothpaste, my cheek tissue has been chemically burned right out of my mouth, like acid, each and every time I brushed my teeth. Every time!
It takes about an hour. By then my tongue, which also hurts by the way, can start finding the dead cheek tissue, which just peels off of the cheek wall like old wallpaper. Before long every last part of my cheek lining, over and under, side to side, all of it, gone. Each time. Every time. Five times now. It isn’t getting better. In fact, it’s only hurting worse.
Obviously, once again, I’m forced to discontinue use of a Crest Pro-Health product. As it is not “pro-health” in any sense of the phrase for me. Besides the chemical burns, it also is making me pretty nauseous. Could be because my body just doesn’t enjoy being chemical burned. Could be that it’s not only causing acid-like burning, but also some kind of poisoning. Above and beyond the usual fluoride.
Now, obviously, your mileage may vary. Perhaps you’ll not be chemical burned by Crest Pro-Health products at all. I’d have to assume that the majority of the world isn’t, or else there’d be like massive product recalls and class -action lawsuits and goodness only knows what.
And I’m sure, were I the kind of ___-hat that sues on the drop of a dime I could make some case to do just that. Because these Crest Pro-Health products really are causing me serious damage, dental problems, and making me sick.
But I’m not that kind of guy. I just simply refuse to touch another Crest Pro-Health product ever again. Crest has permanently lost me as a customer. Not just out of principle, but for my own health!
I’m sure in a couple of days it’ll all heal up. Especially since this time I was cautious enough to discontinue use before it burned my tongue like last time. All I lost this time was some of my cheek tissue. And my breakfast.
But I’m also not going to just let this slide and take the whole world unawares. So I’m letting you know, severe chemical burns are a possible side-effect of using Crest Pro-Health products! Beware. Be warned. Be careful. If this is happening to me, this could happen to you. If you use a Crest Pro-Health product and you notice any unusual burning of your tongue, cheeks, lips, or gums, discontinue use immediately! It will heal, in time. But not if you keep using the Crest Pro-Health product that burned you.